being a grown-up

I saw Lars and the Real Girl the other night for the first time.  I loved the sweetness of the story, and the mystery of the main character, and the message about how we can all take better care of each other.

And there was a great description of being a grown up that I had to stop and write down.  The writing was beautiful, and I think it’s one of the truest ways of describing adult life I’ve ever heard.

Lars asks his older brother about how he knew he was a grown-up.  His brother–not a big talker–skirts around the topic, and finally answers reluctantly:

“You grow up when you decide to do right, okay?  And not what’s right for you.  What’s right for everybody.  Even when it hurts.”

Then Lars wants to know, “Like what?”

“Like you don’t jerk people around.  And you don’t cheat on your woman.  And you take care of your family.  You know?  And you admit when you’re wrong.  Or you try to, anyway.  That’s all I can think of.  You know, it sounds easy, but for some reason it’s not.”